10.26.2011

I love how sexual you and Rye are. I have a high sex drive myself. My boyfriend doesn't though. He never has sex with me unless I initiate it, and I feel bad because I want it at least once a day. I like toys, but with him wielding it. Any suggestions?

Passion breeds passion. Or at least we've always found this to be true.

Making out usually leads it's way to more advanced measures, doesn't it? It certainly does for us. Rarely, if ever, has there been a makeout session that hasn't led to something with the two of us. Unless it's in public, in which case it leads to something more later on. Plus, if it doesn't, it makes you feel closer, which is never bad.

If you like him working you over with toys, the grab one and get started. I know that's you initiating it, but there's no better way to show you want it than by taking it and running. I'd be quite shocked if when you pulled out a toy and started working your pussy he didn't jump right in with offers to help. And if he doesn't, there's a bigger issue here.


Short of this, try talking about it. Is that his particular fetish? That he likes it when you lead? Is he a submissive? Open up a discussion about it. Maybe it is just that his sex drive is much lower than yours. And maybe it's not. But open and sexual means clear lines of communication. If V and I aren't having as much sex as we normally do, we fucking talk about it. Even in the most nonchalant ways. It doesn't have to be big planned thing. And sometimes talk about sex can lead to some pretty great sex. Or at least a mutual understanding about what's going on.

And if it IS a simple case of your sex drive being higher than his, get your once-a-day fill with yourself. And send him pics or video while you're doing it. That'll get his engines running better than anything. I mean, a lower sex drive just sounds like a challenge to me...

4 comments:

  1. Your dating the wrong guy! Trust me! It's not worth it to stay with him if you are not compatible on this issue. This will solve possible years of agony in the future. Move on!

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  2. Or, you know, also maybe that. Thanks for pointing out this additional conundrum, anon.

    -Rye

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  3. Think this more a communication problem.. If you really care about this guy , talk to him about how you feel.. Maybe he is feeling he is not satisfying you when you talk about toys or when you are initiating sex.. I am no expert , just older than most of you and been around the block a few times.. I know I was intimidated by toys at first but once we were both able to talk about our sexual desires without the other making judgements opened up a whole new world for me.. I am not gay or bi but did enjoy being on the recieiving end of anal sex.. This came about because I was wanting to have anal sex with this one lady.. She would only agree to it if I let her use a vibe on me anally.. Discovered I liked it and after I was able to tell her , we were able to tell each other what we wanted without fear of judgement..

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  4. Well said Charlie! A good addition to the discussion, thanks for letting us in on a bit of your own past with this dilemma!

    -Rye

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