Savage Indeed.

This week's Savage Love (if you don't know what this is, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE???) hit on a subject very near and dear to our horny little hearts.

Since we're anonymous, we're constantly discussing the idea of not being anon any longer. Or how many people know about our blog despite our being anon? Do any friends or family members know about this? If so, would they say anything? Should they? Or would their knowledge of it just show how pervy they are?

Wonder who knows whose pussy/ass combo this is...?

To be fair, you might be thinking we're super overreacting, but given how many people read this blog each day (humblebrag, maybe, but there are a LOT of you out there, THANK YOU!!!), the fact that we've been on Fleshbot a number of times, and some of the people that have blogged, retweeted or linked to stories about us, this concept is not that far off.

So while we debate constantly about this issue, it's nice to sometimes leave it to the lovely, wonderful, hilarious and amazing Dan Savage (we really like him, can you tell?) to set the record straight in case of such an occasion:
How are you supposed to react to the discovery—entirely accidental—that your youngest brother has a "femdom" relationship with his wife? I stumbled over my brother's "anonymous" sex blog. It goes into detail about the "domestic discipline" she subjects him to: humiliation, spanking, "ruined orgasms" (whatever that is!), cuckolding. There are no names, but there are pictures. Their faces are blurred out, but I recognize their living room, their bedroom, the necklace my sister-in-law wears, my brother's chin and hair. If I recognized them, other family members might. What do I say?-Biggest Big Bro 
Besides "Hey, bro, I'm kinky, too!"? (You "stumbled over" your brother's kinky sex blog? How'd that happen? Did he leave it sitting in your driveway?) If you can't bring yourself to say that, BBB, you say nothing and trust that more-distant, less-kinky family members are unlikely to "stumble over" your brother's anonymous femdom blog anytime soon. And even if they do, they're probably not familiar enough with your brother and sister-in-law's home, jewelry, chins, etc., to recognize him.
See? How fucking awesome is that? Thanks Dan!


  1. Your concerns are justified however this is a healthy and what seems like a happy relationship which is most important! If you want to express yourself thid way I do believe most family and friends would support you! And if not are they really friends at all?

    1. Indeed it is, Chris! Unless we've got you fooled into our having a tremendously happy relationship...

      But yeah, all kidding aside, we're sort of thinking the same about friends, sex positive or not, there's nothing wrong with what we're doing.


  2. I think it depends on how comfortable you are in your skin, sexually, and whether or not you (not me, not anyone else) think it's a big deal. I've been "The Writing Buddha" since college, but have gradually started using my real name after seeing how others (whom I admire) have lead the way - Kendra Holliday, Twanna Hines, etc.,. Now... I don't fuck on camera or talk about anything too risque (aside from a Tumblr blog and a few posts here and there), but I look at it this way... everyone's sexual. If our parents hadn't FUCKED we wouldn't be having this conversation. Grandma and Grandma... they fucked, too. Probably had some kinky fantasies and fetishes, as well. If video cameras had been around back then, they would have filmed themselves.

    Ok... so you share your videos with the world. Who cares. You don't "stumble" across a site like this or The Infinite Ache or a Camille Crimson unless you're LOOKING for sexual content. So the friend or cousin who knows... they're pervs, too. It would certainly be awkward to discuss, but we're all adults. Sex is an adult sandbox. We just traded GI Joe and Barbie for vibrators and bondage gear. "Kick the Can" is now Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down. It's nothing more than fantasy and fun. ADULT fun.

    When I hear someone say, "Eww" because of something sexual... I think, "How OLD are you?" Kind of sad, actually.

    Do what you want. Stay anonymous. Reveal your identity. It's your blog... your life.

  3. We don't even know where to start with this one, but just to say holy shit, that response is incredible. Thanks for posting such a well thought out, reasoned and funny response. It's highly appreciated, as usual.