3.30.2013

Excuse Us, Agent Cooper: Would You Like A Slice Of Pie?

SOMETHING IS HAPPENING THAT YOU GUYS NEED TO KNOW ABOUT. He's right here in the bath and his name is Dale Cooper.


If you are not acquainted with this man, take a deep breath in because you're about to get real acquainted with his forearms, thighs, cheeky smile, love for Radiohead and expert ability to make us giggle and then need to fuck immediately.

We found Dale Cooper via a very flattering shout out in Paper Magazine's recent round-up of hipster porn stars. We'll be honest with you, hipster is exactly the appropriate word to describe this man's style. You know what other words apply? Hot, different, interesting, FOREARMS, refreshing, sweet, dirty, playful, FOREARMS. 

Are you starting to get the idea? Watch this video. Then we can talk more. Once you've wiped the drool off your collective faces. 


Is it a little bit weird that he gives a rubber ducky a facial? Sure. We're not big on judgements around here though, and also FOREARMS.

Look, we understand this conundrum pretty intimately, but if shooting gorgeous video, paying attention to unusual lines of incredible bodies, setting your video to a soundtrack of something beside fake moans and groans, and actually appearing to be satisfying your desire for pleasure define "hipster porn," then we fucking love hipster porn. And we fucking love Dale Cooper. 

Hello, our names are Violet and Rye and we have a crush on a gay porn star. FOREARMS.

17 comments:

  1. The video won't play, and I'm a little sad over that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, weird! Just tested it and it's fine for us. Maybe try heading to his XTube page for it? http://www.xtube.com/community/profile.php?user=thisismyfakename

      Hope you can see it!

      V+R

      Delete
  2. Played for me ... "Hipster Porn" love it! ... and ymmmy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Definitely hipster porn and definitely in love with it!

      -V

      Delete
  3. He is SO hot, what a discovery! Definitely the forearms, but also the butt, and the wet white pants? DROOL!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh my. Yes, that was quite enjoyable.

    Doesn't get any less hot on subsequent viewings either.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Endless repeatability. Totally agree.

      - Violet.

      Delete
  5. That is a crap ton of rubber duckies that I can never look at the same way. It also looked like he was pooping duckies when they were coming out of the back of his underwear haha.

    I do not know how I feel about that video. Definitely different for sure. He's definitely also nice to look at. Dat body! But hmm. I feel confused at this point. Damn hipsters. Perhaps further review of this gentleman's work will help me come to a better conclusion of feelings.... *heads off to search the interwebs*

    ReplyDelete
  6. a quick google search yielded this: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dale-cooper/
    which takes you to more wonderful links of his, including his official site. HIV/AIDS activist and gay supporter? Come on. YES PLEASE!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Muscles, forearms, naked videos, sense of humor and commitment to human rights? Come on is right. Dude is the total package.

      - Violet.

      Delete
  7. Oh. OH! Oh my. THAT was something pretty spectacular. YOU are my heros for discovering this. Mmmm... well done.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well thanks! We were pretty fucking thrilled to have found it as well.

      V+R

      Delete
  8. OMG that was hilarious and adorable and hot all at the same time! that is not a combination one finds very often... too bad he's gay, god damn it.

    ReplyDelete
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