Beaded.

As a well-documented lover of butt stuff, it was obvious upon receiving this set of anal beads that I'd be the one reviewing them for EdenFantasys. That's not to say Violet won't have them coiled up in her fine asshole someday soon. But she gets enough toys to try, so I was all dibs on this bad boy.

At first glance, we didn't love the Flexi Felix. Maybe it was because it reminded us both of the Cheshire Cat, grinning stupidly at us, all bones stripped of meat. But for your butt!

Looks aside, this thing is GOOD. This being our first set of anal beads in a world of many sex toys, including plugs and dildos for pegging, I wasn't totally sure what to do with them at first. After some reading on the Google machine, I discovered that you pretty much bury them Cheshire Cat-head deep up your greedy, puckered asshole and just as you're about to let loose your load (or lady load, if you're of the female persuasion), you pull them out of that greedy asshole, SLOWLY.

Felix is pretty damn soft, so introducing the first bead into my ass was easy, smooth and lovely. Looking at the length of it, I was thinking "NO WAY that's all going up there," but it's flexi, like the name says, and before I knew it, the entire length of that bony-ass cat (works both ways actually) was snuggled up inside me.

The other good thing about this cat is that the goofy head has a couple holes in it, so you can loop your lubed up and oh so slippery hand through it in order to get a good SLOW tug going.

Apparently, when you do this, you fire the first shot out of the cannon onto your own face! Or at least you do if you're me.Then you continue to pull (this isn't a fucking ripchord, be gentle, but persistent) and the waves come rolling over.

Would I recommend these? Let's just say next time she shows even a flicker of interest in some ass play (when does she not?), I'm sending this coil right up V's ass. That's as glowing a recommendation as I've got.

Oh, and enjoy the self shot photos, perverts! There's a lot of balls up in here, but you need some to even out the pussy, ass and tits overload you get from us sometimes, don't you?

*This product was provided to us free of charge by Eden Fantasys in exchange for an unbiased review. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines. If legal jargon gets you wet, you're welcome, perverts.